©RELEVANT MAGAZINE // BY ANN SWINDELL     APRIL 18, 2017

All of us have prayers that haven’t been answered yet—at least, not in the way we want them to be. And for some of us, these unanswered prayers feel like the lynchpin of our lives: We feel like if God would just answer this one prayer, everything would finally lock into place.

So what do we do when we’re in the limbo of waiting? How do we keep moving forward? Here are three things to remember:

1. GOD’S TIMING ISN’T THE SAME AS OURS.

We pray and ask God for something—healing, change, breakthrough—because we see our lives from our perspective (which is the only way we can see things!). But God’s perspective is much, much bigger—it’s eternal in its scope and wisdom. When we start praying for something and it doesn’t happen on our timeline, it’s easy to think that God has forgotten us or refuses to answer. But in truth, God is working out all things for our good (Romans 8:28). Sometimes that means that He is waiting on answering a particular prayer now because He can see down the road and He wants what is eternally and completely best for us. So even though God might seem slow sometimes, He’s never actually slow. He’s not even late. His sense of timing is just way, way better.

2. YOU WON’T BE WAITING FOREVER.

Some of us will have certain prayers answered here on earth, and we’re told to pray persistently about the things on our hearts (Luke 18:1-8). And yet, some of us will pray the same prayer for a lifetime and not see it answered in the way we want here on earth. But I can promise you that you won’t be waiting forever. There is a day coming when Christ will return and make all things new (Revelation 21:5). On that day, every prayer will be answered in its truest and best way, every sickness will disappear, and every trouble will fade. Even death will be swallowed up in life (2 Corinthians 5:4). Christ Himself will meet every longing and fulfill every dream, and all of our waiting will end.

3. GOD LOVES YOU WHOLEHEARTEDLY AND WITHOUT RESERVATION.

Our culture constantly implies that love is the same as license—that loving someone means giving them what they want. But true love isn’t anything like that; true love means giving someone what they deeply need, even if it’s not what they immediately want. God loves us in this way, and that’s why He has given us Christ—His life, death, and resurrection—to secure the way for us to have right relationship with Him. This is the truest form of love: giving us a way to be redeemed when we’ve never deserved it and can’t earn it.

So, when it feels like our prayers keep going unanswered and it might feel like God isn’t loving us, the reality is that He loves us more than anyone else. He proved that love at the cross.

ANN SWINDELL is the author of the new book Still Waiting: Hope for When God Doesn’t Give You What You Want. You can find her online at annswindell.com.

Christmas is only in a couple days. What a wonderful time of year this is, with the Christmas lights, Christmas movies, delicious food, Christmas music, hot chocolate, Christmas shopping, and more. Each of these elements help to make the Christmas season special. However, they don’t quite complete the picture. The element we are missing is the very person that Christmas is supposed to be all about. And if you have ever been in a church service at Christmas time, you have probably heard a message about the true meaning of Christmas, which is Jesus. This holiday is a celebration of the birth of our Savior. Jesus came with a purpose: to live among us as a human example, to bring salvation to the world, and to give us the opportunity to be set free from sin through our faith in Him. Not only is Jesus the meaning of Christmas, but He gives meaning to our lives.

This Christmas, that is what I am being reminded of… that our lives have meaning and purpose. Because of Jesus, so many lives have been changed, including mine… and maybe yours. One person whose life was drastically changed by Jesus was Mary, the mother of Jesus. In Luke 1, you can find the story of when it all happened. God sent an angel, named Gabriel, to tell Mary that she would give birth to a child, who would be the Son of God. At the time, she was not married, she was a virgin, and she was only a teenager, so I’m sure this came as a shock to her. But she was delighted to accept this purpose that God had bestowed upon her, to be the mother of Jesus Christ. And as far as we know, she did a pretty great job at it.

Growing up, I have always known about Mary who gave birth to Jesus. But I have never had the opportunity to really look deeply at her story. The focus of this story, for me, has always been on Jesus coming into the world, not so much on Mary. So recently, I studied Luke 1 again and only focused on Mary. And as I studied her story, I asked myself: what can I learn from Mary? Three things stood about from the way she responded to God’s call on her life.

The first thing I noticed about Mary was that she was obedient. When God called her, she didn’t hesitate. Yeah, I’m sure she was shocked and confused. But still, her response was “Behold, I am the servant of the Lord; let it be to me according to Your Word” (Luke 1:38). She accepted the opportunity. Though she didn’t know what to expect, or even how to be a mother, she loved God and trusted that He knew what He was doing. She responded with obedience.

The second thing I noticed about Mary was that she had a great attitude. When she obeyed, she did not complain or grumble about it. She was joyful and thankful. In fact, Luke 1:46-55 shows us a song of praise that she gave to the Lord. And in that song she said “My soul magnifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior…” When we obey the Lord, but we complain the whole time, it is not true obedience. True obedience is when we are joyful and have willing hearts towards the Lord, like Mary did.

The third thing I noticed about Mary was that she was faithful. Throughout the whole process, of being pregnant, giving birth, and raising Jesus, she was faithful to her purpose. This calling on her life was not easy, I’m sure. Could you imagine being Mary? She was only twelve or thirteen years old when God told her she would give birth. She didn’t have much money, if any at all. Then, once people found out she was pregnant, I can only imagine that her neighbors and people in her community were gossiping about her since she was so young and was only engaged at that point in her life. Then she also had to try and explain to people that it was the Holy Spirit that caused her to be pregnant, and not Joseph. On top of all of that, she had to flee her home with Joseph in order to give birth to Jesus, since King Herod wanted baby Jesus dead. These are not some easy circumstances to face, especially while being pregnant. Yet even still, she remained faithful. Mary was faithful to feed Jesus, change his diaper, teach him how to walk and talk… as well as all the other essential things that every child needs to have growing up. She was faithful in doing those small, but important, things.

It’s remarkable how faithful Mary was to this purpose. Even when Jesus was being crucified, she was faithful to God’s plan. She didn’t try to stop them from hurting Jesus or killing Him. She was silent and let it happen. How any mother could stand to see their child being killed is unexplainable. But she was able to let it happen only because she knew that Jesus’ death was all a part of God’s plan to save the world. Her commitment to God was incredible.

Mary was just an ordinary person, but God gave her an extraordinary purpose. The same goes for you and me. We may each be just ordinary people, but God has an extraordinary purpose for each of us. The Bible commands us to love God first and then love His people. Those are the two greatest commandments we have been given. God has created each of us uniquely with a unique way to carry out our purpose of loving others and telling the world about God. For Mary, it was being a mother to the Savior of the world. For me, it has been showing young girls that they are loved and valued. For you, at may be something else. And when we are faithful to God and obedient with the small things, extraordinary things will happen.

The important thing to know, today, is that you have a purpose. God calls you worthy. God calls you loved. And God has given you a purpose – a unique way that only you can show the world His love and wonder. So, this Christmas, may you be reminded of that. Remember that Jesus not only came to set you free, but He came to give you life and life abundantly (John 10:10). An abundant life which is full of purpose, just like Mary’s was.

I hope you that have a Merry Christmas and a wonderful New Year! May this coming year, 2017, be a year of purpose. May you recognize God’s love for you. And may you find joy in doing the ordinary, little things this year… remembering that they, too, can share God’s love and amount to something extraordinary. You are extraordinary and can make an extraordinary difference, because of Jesus.

-Jen Sargent

In high school, I was a homecoming princess, tennis captain, speech and debate president, honor society scholarship chair, part of a team that won the community project for Business Leaders of America in the US championship, and salutatorian out of a class of over 400 students. On top of everything, I was involved in church and volunteered over 200 hours. During my high school days, from the outside, it seemed that my life was together. I was raised that I could do anything I wanted if I put my mind to it, and it was true. My family loved and supported me, my friends were right beside me, and my teachers trusted me, but the achievements cost me. I would wake up at 6:30 am and go to bed at 2 am most nights. I was exhausted, rash, angry, and snapped if I felt someone needed to be put in his or her place. I cared and loved people, but I did not have time for myself, others, or for God. I went months without praying or reading my Bible. My attitude was anything but honoring to God.

Senior year was a blur, it was a lot of hard work, but it was also full of great memories. During the year, I ended up applying to over 20 colleges and universities throughout the United States and an endless number of scholarships. Out of all the colleges, my decision was between University of Southern California and Wheaton College, two very different schools, and I had never visited either. One was a secular, party school in the hot climate of Los Angeles and the other was a Christian college in the arctic weather of Chicago. In my heart, I had the peace that I needed to go to Wheaton even though I had no concrete answer for why. I knew no one in Chicago, I had never been to the school, and I didn’t know if I could even afford it. I ended up making the decision to go to Wheaton turning down scholarships for local schools. My mom, my best friend, was heartbroken and did not support my decision.

The summer of 2013, before I headed to college 3000 km from home, we visited Romania for almost two months. In August, I found myself stranded in the Las Vegas airport before finally making it to Wheaton. I started the school year with a clique of friends which I quickly stopped hanging out with. I did cliques in high school, and was sick of it because it excludes people out. Since I had done so many clubs and activities in high school, I joined none my first year of college. I was so tired that all I did was homework. In college, the best way to get to know others is through activities that I did not do. I also felt very excluded because I felt people could not understand me. I came from such a different immigrant background. The only friends I made the first semester were my Hispanic roommates and two other girls. My roommates lived in Chicago and would often leave weekends, so I was alone.

I went from miss popular, who knew almost everyone in my high school to feeling so alone that I would cry in the bathroom, so no one would hear me, in a college campus of over 2400 students. I was shattered and so broken. I had placed my identity in my family, friends, and achievements. I have always been confident, afraid of nothing. If I ever were afraid of something, I would push myself to do it and overcome it. I could not overcome the spot I was in. My family did not support my decision of being at Wheaton, I had few friends, and my achievements meant nothing at Wheaton. Everyone was just as talented if not more so. All I could do was cry to God, “Lord do you hear me? Do you care?” My identities were shattered, but that’s when I truly began to grow. I felt a little like Job. God crushed me, my ego, and brought me to my knees. I hadn’t prayed for months and the first year of college my free thoughts were prayers. It was while I felt that I had nothing that I was reminded of how truly much I had. During the first semester, through the hardship, God transformed me.

After I came back from Christmas break, I joined a disciple small group. Slowly, God began to answer my prayer and bring wonderful people in my life. When I went back for summer break, my mom was amazed at the change in my life. It was during that time that she proclaimed that God had led me to Wheaton and wanted me there. I was no longer irritable, rash, rude, proud, or arrogant. I began to have peace, patience, gentleness, selflessness, and self control. It was through going through the darkness of loneliness and brokenness that God began to shine His light in and through me.

I went from wanting to quit and transfer to leading a small group myself the next year. I went from not having the support of my family, to them encouraging and strengthening me. I had almost no friends, and now I have a family at Wheaton. I began to get involved in extracurricular activities and to give back by interning at a legal immigration office. I began to have purpose in what I was doing. I finally learned that it was because of God that I am where I am. It’s not my own achievements, my own strength, but through God’s wonderful grace.

Currently, I’m writing this blog post in Bucharest, Romania about 10,000 km away from home. Once again, I find myself struggling with the same issues that I did my first year of college, but it doesn’t have the same destroying affect it did the first time. I now know to trust in God and to seek His children for community. Through the good and hard, I am grounded, not in the things that will pass, but in the one true thing that is constant, Jesus. Wherever I find myself, I know that everything will be okay. God has me where He wants me, and I am here to simply love Him and my neighbor with my whole heart.

Below, is a Facebook post I wrote during one of my hardest moments, and the same is true 3 years later and 7000 km away.

Dear brothers and sisters,

I am weak, selfish, prideful, judgmental, hateful, unthankful, and needy. I may seem to have it all together, but in reality I am in need of prayer. For the past year, I have been living in a spiritual desert. There have been months in which I went without prayer. When I did pray, it was to cry out to God (feeling all alone). I knew Jesus was my savior and Lord, but I chose nonetheless to carry my own burdens. My walk has slowly transformed from upright standing to slowly bending and being on my knees. I am sooo blessed. I have family members who would sacrifice their lives for me; I have friends who endlessly remind me of their love; I have met people at Wheaton who have been a constant reminder of Jesus’ love; I go to a Christian college when thousands would put themselves at risk for a chance at education, yet I felt abandoned. I am blessed beyond reason, yet my pride prevented me from seeking help or realizing my need. This past couple of months, God has humbled and convicted me. Through the grace of God (even though it wasn’t pleasant), I have reevaluated what is important to me. As I mentioned, I am all of the above. I clearly struggle and need assistance, yet through God’s grace I am slowly learning to trust and love.

Brothers and sisters, I do not share this to bring attention to my life, but rather to the faithfulness of our Father. God commands us to “seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness” (Matthew 6:33). To all of you who struggle and carry unnecessary burdens remember that, “He gives to the beasts their food, and to the young ravens that cry” (Psalms 147:9). If he takes care of the beasts and ravens, how much more will our dear Father provide for (us) his children.

Dear sons and daughters of God, trust God, pray to your Father who loves dearly (not only for yourselves, but for each other), and love your neighbor; remember that God is faithful no matter what desert you are in or what burden you care. Don’t be afraid to ask others for prayer; God made community intentional. 🙂

With love in Christ,

A humbled sister and daughter

No matter wherever you are in life, be encouraged that you have someone greater than any guiding your way. The King of kings cares for me, and for you intimately.

Geta

As a glittr team we love to connect with and encourage girls all over Romania!  We want every girl to know they are loved, appreciated, valued, enough, chosen, beautiful and wonderfully made in the image of God.  We try to spread that message across the country through our events, small groups and social media.  All of our main events have been in Bucharest but we love it when we are asked or given the opportunity to do something outside of the city.  

And this past weekend we got to do just that!  

As a team, we made our way out to a village called Corbeanca, which is just north of the airport in Bucharest.  Boy did we have fun!!  We enjoyed our time with the girls playing games, talking and encouraging them.  For our team, the time we shared with the girls in the small groups were some of our favorite moments.  It was beautiful to hear their thoughts about beauty and identity and one girl even shared that she believed with her whole heart that God loved her and died for her.  So amazing!  

The evening came to a close and after many hugs and photos together, the girls left for their homes.  We hope and pray that each girl left encouraged, inspired and walked confidently knowing that they are a daughter of the most high King!  As we made our way back to Bucharest the images of each girl’s smile and their laughter was imprinted in our thoughts and minds.  We look forward to our next visit and continuing our relationship with these incredible girls.  

If you have a heart for teenage girls and would love to start something in your community or area, let’s talk!  Write us and let us know what your needs are and what God has placed on your heart to do.  You can contact us at info@glittr.ro
We look forward to hearing from you soon!

You can see more photos from the event here.

Dear daughters,

I am writing you today in honor of the recent celebration of all mothers on International Women’s Day (March 8th). I believe we all need our mothers at some point in our life. They are our foundation to life. A lot of who we are is because of our mothers.

When you are little, you rely on your mother for everything and she is there, feeding you, changing you, bathing you, teaching you all the basic skills in life, answering many “why” questions and so much more. As you grow, you begin to do more things on your own. When you reach that point in your life, where you are now, you may think you don’t need your parents or they don’t understand. I remember when I thought the same thing and then I asked my mom her thoughts about something and she shared with me some of her experiences and I was amazed how she had been through some of the same things I was going through.

Believe it or not, but I bet your mom has a lot of wisdom because she had to go through some of the same things, and guess what?! She probably thought the same thing about her mother when she was your age. I could confidently say, that your mother would probably love to sit down with you and listen to what is going on in your life. Great things happening or maybe some difficult things as well.

Many people come and go in your life. Some of the friends that you have now, you may not have a few years from now. They may only be in your life for a season. But your mother or the women in your life that has loved you, mothered you, and mentored you will be by your side for years to come. This beautiful quote sums it up…

“A mother is the only person who loves you, just because you exist.”

We all want to be loved, accepted and appreciated no matter where we are in life. Girls, you are a daughter because of your mother. Your mother works very hard for you in the smallest of details to the biggest plans of your life. They need to hear from you that you love them and appreciate the many things that they do for you on a daily basis. Take time to thank them this week in big and small ways. Remember…

“Life doesn’t come with a manual, it comes with a mother.”

Sincerely,
Andrea

“She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future. When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness.”
-Proverbs 31:25-26

This time every year, you can’t help but sit back and reflect on the last year as it comes to an end. It may have felt like the year flew by quickly or it may have felt that it would never end. It may have been one of the best years of your life and you never want to forget it. Or maybe it was a year filled with many difficult moments and you can’t wait to start a new year. However your year has been, the good news is that there is another year and a new start.

2016 will begin in a few days. You have a new start. Will you continue being the person you were in 2015? What will you change this next year? Where is your relationship with Jesus? How do you want to grow? Before 2016 arrives, make goals. Dream. Believe in the BIG things God has for you this next year. Take time to pray and listen to what God may be trying to tell you. We all have made mistakes and will probably continue to make mistakes. But the wonderful thing is that God offers forgiveness and grace. We can go to Him about anything and He offers a new start. A new beginning. A new life.

So, for this next year, above everything else, remember these words, declare them, and say them out loud:

(Speak this over yourself)
“I am deeply loved,
divinely appointed,
abundantly equipped,
and profoundly cherished by God.
No enemy plan, scheme or obstacle can
keep me from God’s highest and best
will for me. As I follow the voice of my Savior,
I see the invisible, accomplish the impossible,
and love the unlovable.
I am a living-breathing miracle because
Jesus Christ lives in me!
Amen.”

-Susie Larson

Happy near year!

If only I could sit down with my teenage self today and give a few words of encouragement. I never really had anyone growing up that I would have called a mentor. You know, someone who would just tell you the truth. I feel like if I only would have had someone tell me once that I had purpose and meaning, I would have made much better decisions in my early life. Instead, I heard messages about how I was never doing anything right. I tried hard to please everyone; some in good ways and then again, in some not so honoring to God. Would you let me be that friend and mentor that I never had? May I speak to your heart today and tell you the truth that was never shared with me as a teenage girl?

First, God made you unique with talents and gifting like no other person in the world. He created you from the inside out starting with your heart and soul. He created you to love and share a deep, intimate and trusting relationship with Him. There is no reason in the world to believe that He is waiting at every turn to beat you up and want to punish and reject you because you are not perfect. The very second you were formed in the mind and eye of God, you were called “perfect” because you were formed in His own image. Yes, you were made in God’s image.  God’s opinion of you and your immense worth to Him never changes.  There is nothing that could ever stop Him from loving and adoring you.  Nothing. Take Him at His word when He says “I have loved you with an everlasting love.” You can trust God. Don’t measure His promises and His love by the acts of others. He is trustworthy and has your best interest in mind at all times. He has an amazing plan for your life and you can depend on that always. There will be a tendency to measure yourself by what others do and say.  Looking for acceptance by others and measuring your self-worth by what others say rather than what God says about you is dangerous. Choose your friends well. Make sure that you and they are building each other up with God’s opinion instead of what the world would want you to believe.

Believe that you were made with a purpose.  You may not see your unique purpose today, but the people you meet and the details of every day are strategically planned by God. He tells us in His word we “are His handiwork, created in Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.” The great news is that not only do you have purpose but God, who made heaven and earth, trusts you to do His work! He trusts you and only you and His confidence is in you. Yes, there are days when everything seems to go wrong. Remember you view your life as if you are walking in the fog.  You cannot see ahead of yourself clearly. You keep going on but don’t see the full picture. However, God sees all things in the big picture of your life and how your life will intersect with others. As you lean on Him for direction and guidance, He cheers you on and says, “That’s my girl!! I am so very proud of her”.

You see my friend, never ever forget God is for you.  He is proud of you, and trusts you in the amazing plan He has for your life as He cheers you on.

Pam, USA

Dear Sixteen-year-old me,

Hey girl! I know you have lots going on right now but it’s really important we have a talk; an important talk. It’s me, you, but you 28 years from now and there are some life changing things you have to know before you make some terrible choices. So, if you could turn off that TV and disconnect that phone, it would be great because what I am about to say can be life altering, if you choose to listen to yourself.

I hate to tell you this, but our years have been pretty tough since and had I known what I know now, I could have avoided a lot of heartache and pain. So, that’s why I’m making the time to talk to you today. I’ve found myself saying, “Why didn’t someone tell me this?” quite a bit lately. And I look back and realize: some of the things nobody told me and some of the things someone wanted to and tried to tell me but I didn’t listen. I didn’t listen because… I knew it all. 😉 Well, guess what girl, you don’t know it all and because you aren’t listening to the people who love you with genuine hearts; your road is going to be rough and ugly unless you are willing to listen to what you (the older and much wiser you) has to say.

I’ll try my best to keep it short and spare you the ugly details of your choices but here are five fast facts you have to hear sooner instead of later.

1. MOM: I know you’re pretty independent now, but you need to know, mom is very important and you still need her. You need to be talking with her and listening to her advice. I know you think she won’t understand but she does. She was once your age and although things were different “back then” the emotions, feelings and needs of a girl are still very much the same. Mom understands the things you are facing, she went through many of the same things, and look, she survived them. Don’t be afraid to ask her questions about her teen days. She’ll share them with you. She just doesn’t because you don’t give her time.

I need you to stop and think differently about mom for a minute. You see, there are many women in this world and you could have been given any of them as your mom but you weren’t. You have the mom that was picked just for you. A woman who was excited when she learned she was pregnant was chosen just for you. You were preciously placed inside her womb to be carefully and wonderfully knit together. Your growth took many minutes, days, and months before you were ready to enter this world. Through every one of those, that woman was bonding with you and learning to love you with an unconditional love. Once you entered this world she wanted the best for you. She took care of all your needs and always put those needs before her own. She was your first friend and will be your forever friend until the day she dies. But, the hard reality is, the day will come when she is no longer there like she was. It will break your heart and you will have lots of regret. So, get it through that beautiful brain of yours, you need to trust, talk with, listen to and respect your mom. She loves you with all her heart and only wants what is truly best for you. And she knows what that best is.

2. CLOTHES: You know those clothes that everybody else is wearing that you just have to have and throw fits when you don’t get them … well, they aren’t all that amazing. That name brand and expensive price tag doesn’t prove anything about you. You weren’t made to fit in you were designed to stand out. Be a pink flamingo amongst a gang of turkeys! Wear clothes that you like, that look good on you & your body shape, and keep it modest. You want to catch someone’s attention by the nice things you do, the kind way you treat others and the class you have. The best designer thing you can wear is your smile.

3. FRIENDS: Friends will come and friends will go. And yes, they are important but friends are like shoes. There are different ones for different moments in your life. Think about those High Heels – They look really good and can take you to new heights but if you aren’t careful they’ll cause you to fall. And those Flip Flops – What you see is what there is. And most importantly those Running shoes – They’ll go the distance with you. Just like a pair of shoes needs two to be complete, you have to be a real friend to have a real friend. Remember this, a real friend walks in when the rest of the world walks out.

4. BOYFRIENDS: Learn to be friends with boys. You shouldn’t have to date a guy to get to know him. He should be a good friend before you consider giving him your full attention and your heart. Don’t start a relationship on how someone looks but build one on how they act.

5. GOD: I know you believe in a God who created the earth and looks down on you, watching every move you make, but remember that thing you went to when you were 14 and they told you about a man who was called names, made fun of, spit on, beat up and gave his life because of His love for you? Yes, remember, that man named Jesus, and how how you felt when you heard about this and you went forward and gave your heart to Him? Then, you left that night with a fire in your heart and a new excitement but you didn’t know what to do next? So, that fire went out? Well, there are people who want to come alongside you and help you figure out what to do next in order to keep that fire burning so your poor choices don’t burn you. Well, you can find these people at a church or in a girls ministry group like glittr. There are women there who have been there and done that and want to share their bad for your good and help you find out how to have a relationship with Him that will finally fill that spot your are trying to fill in your life.

I’m sure your attention span is gone. So, I will end and you can read this letter again but only one number a week and really think about what I have said. Now, you can say a little less, “I wish someone would’ve told me,” because you have told you. And, now that you know different, BE DIFFERENT!

YOU ARE LOVED MORE THAN YOU COULD EVER KNOW! I LOVE YOU AND BELIEVE IN YOU!

Sincerely, Me

Katie, USA, 44